One night I was in Louisville wheeling. It was really muddy, it had rained for about two weeks straight. After following the trail for about 25 or 30 miles I ended up in an old run down trailer park.

I noticed a light was on in one of the most dilapatated trailers there. Being that I had been in the truck for a while I really had to take a dump. I thought I would see if they would be so kind as to let me use the toilet. When I knocked on the door an older somewhat attractive woman opened the door and invited me in.

After finishing my business, I thanked the woman and told her I would be on my way. She jumped off the couch and said not so fast. No one uses my restroom for free. Being as I had no money on me I was getting nervous. At that point she said if I didn't have any money I would have to find another way to pay her. She stated that she hadn't been with a man in 2 years and she was tired of waiting.

She stripped off my clothes and threw me on the couch. She started giving me a lap dance telling me that she used to be a stripper before her son was born, seems her son was born a tad "slow" and she had to be home with him 24 hrs a day. He even had to wear headgear whenever he was awake.

I'll spare you the graphic details but during our "activities" I became stuck inside of her. I was horrified, no matter how hard I tried I could not seperate us. She then stated that she had some crisco oil in the kitchen that we should try. So I walked backwards in to the kitchen with her still attached, her doing a version of the crab walk.

After I got us unstuck I was washing my hands when I noticed some drawings on the fridge, they were signed by several of her children ( I thought she only had one). Evidently she had three boys because the pictures were either signed Love Spanky, Love Tonka, or Love Ross.

So that's my most stuck moment ever. I have not been back to Kentucky since, nor do I plan too.