[RANT] I hate the internet. Not safe for consumption.

You know, I despise the internet sometimes.

Fuck you, twelve year old dipshit, who downloads all of the "Free stuff" you find on whatever en vogue file sharing application your buddies at school are jerking off to now. You are the reason that bandwidth costs for legitimate sites have gone through the fucking roof, and the reason a decent file-sharing application can't last more than 6 months. Fuck you for making something that, for years, has gone on quietly and unnoticed a national phenomenon because you're too stupid to realize that what you're doing is illegal. Fuck you for not understanding words like "discretion," "anonymity," and "common fucking sense." Get your sorry, prepubescent ass off of my internet.

Fuck you, people with twisted and disgusting habits and fetishes who group together from around this horrible planet, convincing each other that your lewd and often illegal behavior is somehow normal and that you're just misunderstood. I understand you; YOU'RE A FUCKING SICKO. You pollute our ether with your filth and insanity, and you have no business sharing it with those of us who have healthy habits, like "enjoying normal, homo sapien intercourse" and "brushing our teeth." Get your furry, child-loving ass off of my internet, father.

Fuck you, you pimple-faced, virus-writing butter-troll. Your inability to watch your diet or get any exercise outside of jerking off to porn-site previews has made you an enemy of civilization. So, you can write and modify self-replicating code that effectively disables systems? WOW. If you're so god-damned smart, why don't you have a job? If you're so god-damned clever and cool, why aren't you fucking Cindy Margolis instead of printing out pictures of her and wrapping them around your tiny, malformed member that you swear is ten times bigger than normal just because you use Linux? Why don't you smell like $400-a-bottle cologne, instead of the faint aroma of week-old pizza that emanates from the greasy spot on your XXXL "L33T HAX0R" black T-Shirt? That's OK, because after you cost businesses millions of dollars, YOU'LL be the Cindy Margolis Fruit Roll-Up, buddy. Oh, not interested in prison butt rape? Fine. Get your hideous, code-mangling, socially dysfunctional, pimpled ass off of my internet.

Fuck you, ignorant teenage attention whore. You're a blight on the fine institution of prostitution, showing your under-aged titties to horny old men if they buy you the latest copy of Oprah's Book of the Week. You waste the technology that COULD be the video phone on your pathetic attempts to get the world to look at you, and in so doing have turned the next fourteen generations of males into woman-hating misogynists who see you and the rest of your gender as nothing more than a means to an end -- that end being a self-induced orgasm, adding a cum-stain next to that greasy pizza-stain, or getting it on their stuffed-animal/lover. Fuck you for not having enough self-respect to keep your fucking shirt on. Get your uncovered ass off of my internet.

Fuck you, elitist piles of shit. You think whatever product or cause you're venomously defending is the greatest thing in the world, and that people who think otherwise should be skinned alive and dipped in a vat of the melted plastic of whatever product is the "ENEMY" of yours. But, curiously, you had precisely DICK to do with said product's inception, and you're little more than a marketing TOOL; you've been bought, lock-stock-and-barrel, by a corporate over mind, and now you're a walking commercial! I don't care if you're pushing the next great Operating System, video game system, alternative fuel, $400 brand of cologne, car, truck, or brand of camera to stare at naked, underage girls on, you're a fucking TOOL. Get your bi-directional, ratcheting ass off of my internet.

Fuck you, illiterate 17-year old. You can barely read! What are you doing trying to communicate with the rest of the world? Wait, didn't you just get a driver's license? What the fuck are you doing on the internet aside from spewing what could only be described loosely as verbal diarrhea? Maybe "u" should go find an English class and do something besides try to find out the URL to the "hot hot omg" naked web cam ran by the girl in front of you. Maybe then, once you've caught up with those who can actually spell three-letter-words, we'll take you seriously when you tell us how much better the Nintendo Ultra Gameblocks are than the Sony Playtime Station is. Until then, "git ur a$$ off my ntRnet"

Just for the record, this rant has nothing to do with this board, as most of you seem really cool and level-headed. I'm just pissy.

Hahahahaha. At least half of this does apply.

I really hope you feel at least a little better...

Much!

so you're saying you don't have any fetishes (even as simple as saying you're an "ass-", "tit-" or "leg-man"? you've never looked at free porn? you've never downloaded a file from a file-sharing program? you've never defended something you support, or don't support via an email or a message board (well, you just did...)

i sense jealousy- you're not capable of writing code. you don't have the body to make money in the internet porn biz.

here's what i think:
12 year olds download free shit because, well, they don't have the means to buy anything. i mean, i mowed lawns when i was a kid. but i couldn't by a few cds a week on it, that's for sure.

people have fetishes. all kinds. and if they're not projecting them onto you, then leave them alone.

everybody has their "thing". i ride bikes. i play guitar. some kid has his computer and that's what he does. most of them do not write viruses. there are a few, sure, but it's rare.

if i knew i could make good money on the internet by posing for a few pics, i'd consider it! it's better than what i do now!

people buy into products, ideologies, politicians, businessmen, etc. all the time- again, most don't go around spewing their mouths about it. and if you believed in something, and had a strong opinion about something, you'd spread the word, too. or maybe you're not educated enough to know any better.

sadly, you're right about the illiterate youth. it's depressing. but i have a fair amount of friends who are teachers, and a lot of the blame can be placed on apathetic parents. even some teachers don't give a shit about the students. they're there for their summers off.

i'm not attacking you for anything you wrote- you're entitled to your opinion (and you're entitled to post it on the internet, too!) but it's not the internet's fault (or Al Gore's, since we know he invented it ) that people have decided to make use of it however they feel like. it's an open forum for information, whether it be good or bad. whatever you don't like, don't visit. i'm making a lot of generalizations, but then, so did you.

and the costs are actually coming down, considering web hosts used to start in the $15-20 range. i know of a web host offering $7-9 reliable service. you must use AOhelL- they're still outrageously overpriced.

Eh, a lot of it is intended to be a bit hypocritical, sarcastic, and tongue-in-cheek. The 'holier-than-thou' tone is meant as hyperbole, and yeah, I realize that there are a LOT of fairly normal, productive people that do plenty of other things. What I'm taking a jab at, more than anything, is how far, far too seriously people take the internet.

Pissy or not, I gotta say that I for one, love it. Well said. I repsect a man who is as upfront and brutally honest as I am. Kodos.

Oh Sean, havent heard nor seen you in quite some time. I am glad to see you have come back to post some more of that senseless liberal crap.

Dude you are not on paradise hotel.....

Let us all rejoice knowing that you realize you can't.....
BRX

You lost me pal....

yeah- bike racing season is almost over, so i'm getting back to 'wheeling and spending a little more time playing on the internet. oh, and it helped that i've been off of work for 4 days (guess what else i've been doing in my free time? looking at FREE PORN!!)

that's right! because it's only us liberals who look at porn, write computer programs (viruses or not), play video games, get on political or religious soapboxes, etc...

looked to me like you were taking it too seriously!

Well then, lets head for the mountains soon. And yes, I poked a little fun at your liberal views.

i see a nipple!!!

I just want you all to know that upon reading that I stuck my finger in my ear and shook it vigorously for 5 seconds.

Eargasm.

CONGRATULATION, YOU FOUND HIDDEN PRIZE!

Preach it!

Oh, and Off2cjb... what the hell is a "Kodo?"

You lost me at "You know"...

Darn, the spelling police finally busted me. Look out Chia.

You had to edit that?

I'm amazed she can operate a keyboard at all . . .

If Steven Hawking can do it... Someone probably makes a "Handicapable Keyboard" for people with really short arms.

Liz, your birthday present leaves the post office TOMORROW, I swear!