In a drunken stupor, after downing 3 too many White Russians, your wife swiped your X and took off into the muddy night.

After getting lost in the woods and going down the wrong trail, she got the ass end off the track and into a puddle measuring 4&3/4 ft by 2&3/16 ft. Upon finding that screaming Aw f%^$king shit at the top of ones lungs does not get the truck unstuck, she pukes for 3.37 minutes, causing the rear to slide down 2.3 meters to come to rest at an angle of +15.6 degrees from horizontal.

Jumping back in the rig with a puke stenched second wind, she throws it in reverse while stomping on it, causing a rampant upfling of mud and puke off the right rear wheel, just barely clipping the front door with the chunnky combination but managing to cover almost all of the rear door.

Did I win the cookie???