There was this one time, I was driving a BMW and being a total dick, and I start tailgating this jerk in a white Xterra.

This idiot, he drives over a freakin' log in the middle of the freakin' road!
I was so far up his ass, I never saw the log until the last minute!
Tore up my airdam and ever'thing, man . . .

That Xterra guy . . . what a dick.