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#151167 - 03/04/06 03:59 PM XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


It never ceases to amaze me the numerous arguments and drama we have here on the forums. This is a place to post your favorite XOC quotes. Whether it be an insult, tirade or insightful comment, I'd love to see folks dig out some of our funniest moments.

My contribution:

Before you try to sue Nissan for a stolen spare talk to Chris:

Quote:
Originally posted by Chris..:
......You sir, are up there with the whiny crackpots who take something as frivilous as someone calling you names from up to a few thousand miles away so seriously....
....Your case is as sad as you are. You were called out, and you pissed your pants like the three year old you are. Nobody, absolutely no one, agrees with you on this. So there is only one simple solution here: leave....
.....You won't have to deal with rednecks who scoff at you because you didn't get the shiny red bike that everyone else got at Christmas. And we don't have to listen to some whiny, estrogen-infested little cocksucker who wants to get everything handed to him on a silver platter because his pussy hurts.......
...

Before you decide to live with the Grizzlies, talk to Shazam:

Quote:
Originally posted by Shahram:
I read the article in National Geographic Adventure, and have seen some documentary footage about him, and I have to admit, the dude was batshit crazy. I don't think he "deserved" what he got, I don't know too many people who deserve to be mauled and eaten alive.....actually, I do, but anyway, a few months after the event, I was hanging out with a friend and his very granola-esque mountain climber type buddies.

They were talking about it and I made a crack about the guy being mentally unstable and ultimately subconsciously suicidal. I respect anyone who risks their life to follow a dream, but the guy's mental capacity had to come into question. His overall demeanor was...well, it was fucking nuts. So I made a not-so-sensitive comment, and the gallery went completely silent. Everyone looked at me with contempt, except for my buddy, who was looking at the floor.
"What."
"Tim was a friend."
"Oh. Sorry."
"Yeah."
"Well, as he was your friend and all," I started to say. Now, this is the part where I probably should have kept my big yapper shut, and just let it die down, but I couldn't.

I just had to feed the bears.

Like I was saying, "as he was your friend and all, nobody thought to, I don't know, tell him he was fucking crazy? Try to stop him? Call his parents? Have him committed?"

Little Miss Latest Swag, all hopped up on Clif Bars, was the first to attack. "Dude, we can't all be Mr. Cool Cigarette Smoking Guy who sits on the couch, making fun of everyone else. Where the fuck do you get off? He was out there, doing what he wanted to, not watching other people do it on TV."

In rapid succession and without defending their "friend", they turned on me, each one taking a bite out of my big fat lazy gas guzzler driving, cigar chomping, naysaying ass. Suddenly, I understood Tim Treadwell better than I ever wanted to.
.....

What can you dig up?

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#151168 - 03/04/06 04:19 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Todrick Offline
Member

Registered: 08/08/00
Posts: 7759
Loc: Arizona
Paraphrased because the original was lost back in 2001... but as true classic sarcastic illustration of a bad situation that had mods and Ian just as involved in the flames as any member, Probably a big turnign point for XOC if we're really honest about it.

Quote:
Originally posted by LAXTERRA:
Operator: XOC 911, May I help you?
Caller: Yes, I'd like to report a fire.
Operator: Where is this fire?
Caller: well it started in the Clubhouse but thankfully has been moved to the Asbestos Lined room.
Operator: So it is contained?
Caller: not exactly, The firemen showed up but they started using members as firewood. Then the chief showed up and dumped gasoline on the whole thing.

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#151169 - 03/04/06 06:45 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
LAXterra Offline
Member

Registered: 06/09/00
Posts: 1038
Loc: West Los Angeles, CA
_________________________
"All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed, second it is violently opposed, and third, it is accepted as self-evident."

Arthur Schopenhauer, Philosopher, 1788-1860

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#151170 - 04/04/06 12:06 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Todrick Offline
Member

Registered: 08/08/00
Posts: 7759
Loc: Arizona
[Spit]

classic

for thsoe who don't know, Sham365 was a short lived little troll here, he went on to another xterra board and became moderator...

the argument started when he slammed pitbulls, Ian and I jumped on him and... well it was a mess.

and if i recall correctly the timeing was such that I was the "pyromaniac" that got thrown out of "your town" for 45 days...

oh good times.

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#151171 - 04/04/06 12:15 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Any quotes from that Idiot up in Alaska?
What was his name again?

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#151172 - 04/04/06 12:54 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
socalpunx Offline
Member

Registered: 24/08/01
Posts: 6327
Loc: The land of losers and liberal...
Shahram has made me chuckle.

Quote:
Originally posted by Shahram:
..a little magical dwarf done come out of the mini-fridge at the hotel, Colonel, and you know what he said to me? He said, 'Y'know what, Big E, you're gonna die, man, you're gonna die of h-h-h-heartattack on the toilet, man. No lie.' And you know what I said to him, Colonel? I said, "Little woodland midget I said little woodland midget I said little woodland midget I said, At least I'm goin' with my dignity."
This should be made into a Lifetime movie:

Shahram:

Lost frustrates the hell out of me. It's like my junkie ex-girlfriend coming home after three days when she said she was going out for smokes and I'm frantic and pissed and yelling "MY GOD!!! WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN AND WHERE IS THE FUCKING RENT MONEY?!?!"
And she yells "YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH!!! YOU DON'T TRUST ME!!! YOU'RE JUST LIKE MY FATHER!!!"
And I yell, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!"
And then she grabs her sweater and says, "My guru said you were gonna try and steal my soul. He was right. I should have listened to him three years ago."
And I'm like "Guru? What guru? You have a guru?"
And then she storms out the front door and dives into a waiting limo, which speeds off before I can see anyone else inside. And now I have to wait like a week before I find out where she's been and where's the rent money, and who is this fucking guru? What is she, taking yoga classes? What the fuck!
And then next week she shows up with a mohawk and she's married to some Croatian mobster dude so he can get a green card, and I still don't know where the rent money is, and I've completely forgotten to ask about the guru, and a midget clown is humping my leg.

That's what watching Lost is like.

Originally posted by Shahram:

As I am sure many of you know that I was incarcerated with Ian. We did a nickel at San Quentin together, and he was totally cool, for a white dude. There were a lot of peckerwoods at Q, especially on D-Block, that could get you just about anything you wanted: a joint, extra smokes, speed bump, or whatever. But Ian, that mofo was what you'd call a master smuggler. That dude could smuggle anything, anywhere, anytime. Last I heard, him and his old lady were smuggling minks and sables out of Siberia underneath Ian's shirt.

This was a magical moment:

Quote:
Originally posted by spalind:
I am not....repeat.....NOT a car salesman!!! Never have been....of all the insults thrown around at me....that would probly be the worst.....
kmoving's greatest hits:

I deal with lucrative contracts daily when a vendor or manufacturer does not live up to thier contracts they are graded and eventually dropped.

Did you know that the bible was created as a tool to control the masses?, what better way to control people than by fear?

Yea, looks good in the parking lot, if you give me a min or two, got to scan them in, I will show you what it looked like rolled when 4wheelin, $9,000.00 to fix, and another time, after I went off a 30' drop head on $11,000.00 to fix, yea I go extreme off road.

say what you will
but you all know that what you just saw cost more that your Xterra's

I am not afraid to break something, are you?
If your not afraid then lets see some real off roading, not the text book stuff..

just going extreme, thats what we do in Alaska, it's either put up or shut up!!, Oh and by the way, no shopping cart dings here.

Right now she's in storage because I can only run here seasonal with the Mikuni dual side drafts:

Just because you dont have the money to spend on hobbies like I do is no reason to get nasty.

When you put as much money into your X as I have, then you can talk smack to me, untill then sit back and be one of the (I wish I could have guy's)

Ok, I will cool it down, as far as money I have money and I have a well paying job, I have also dumped a little more that $10,000.00 into my X, who else has done that?

Education, I have a P.E. and E.E. anyone know what those are? thought not.

I know what I am talking about, and while we are on the subject, what was that comment about me making my own sliders, dont have to, that is what the people that have no education are for, cheap labor.

End of subject.

We'll miss him.
_________________________
If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure. - Vice President James Danforth "Dan" Quayle

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#151173 - 04/04/06 01:04 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


One of my all time favorites. Dang I love this guy!

Quote:
Originally posted by Shahram:
Quote:
Originally posted by Ruger1022:
[b]...it seems that the last customer bought a whopping $1.20's worth...
Dude probably had his wife in the car, she thought they needed gas, he knew that they could totally make it. It'd be close, but they could make it. The low fuel light would go on, and he'd have to hear her bitch about it for the next hour, so he relents and pulls up to the pump. He's out of the car, reaching for his wallet, which contains the tiny plastic cards which represent the dwindling amounts in his checking account. He's fuming. He knows his vehicle. Knows he could totally make it. She doesn't know shit about cars, he grumbles to himself, she doesn't know what this baby can do. He slips his card into the receptacle. Weekend getaway. Shit...meeting her parents and loser brother in the middle of Bumfuck isn't my idea of a weekend getaway. I wanted to go to the Dodger game...but nooooooooo...bitch. As that first gallon trickles into the tank, he realizes the price of gas at this station is highway robbery. Rape. Humiliation. And before that first $1.20 is in, he lunges for the pump, rips it out of the car, and it's back on the rack. He'd walk home to Cerritos before he'd pay that much for gas. It's the principle of the thing. He gets back in the car, looks at his wife with scorn in his eyes.
"That was quick," she says.
"Shut the fuck up."

Nope, I don't know nothin' about it. Never happened. :rolleyes: [/b]

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#151174 - 04/04/06 01:05 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


KMoving [Freak] yeah what a tool

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#151175 - 04/04/06 01:11 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Another great one.

Quote:
Originally posted by TJ:
I took in an abandoned pug many years ago....

Question for experience pugsters...

This pug would fart every time it barked.

The fart and the bark were simultaneous, like a stereophinic simultaneous release from both ends that would blend the two sounds into something like a

"Rouphphph!" instead of a "Rough!" type of bark, or a

"Phhphph!" sort of fart.

When he would get going, we'd laugh, which made him bark/fart (Bart?/Fark?), which made us laugh, etc...

This was very dangerous, as the odiferous nature of the one end produced nausea and a lingering sense (Scents?) of fire and brimstone, decaying vulture brains, etc.

Do any of you have Bart Farking pugs?

eek

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#151176 - 04/04/06 01:20 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


My favorite...

ronw39 July 14, 2004

"This site is a valuable asset to the Xterra owner, great job to the original creator! However I have been reading topics for a few months as a guest. I find it very offensive at the language and general attitude being displayed by the current operator of the site. This Ian has violated many of the Rules, Policies, and Disclaimers. Including, Abusive, hateful, harassing, obscene, and defamatory. It is my sugestion to Nissan to pull him from operating this board and sue him for seriously violating the rules. He controls this board, and through his poor attitude has set the mood for some of the members to do the same. You Ian are a disgrace to the XTERRA name."

xoc
Fuck you.

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#151177 - 04/04/06 01:22 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
socalpunx Offline
Member

Registered: 24/08/01
Posts: 6327
Loc: The land of losers and liberal...
Ian,

is that you ? [Wave]
_________________________
If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure. - Vice President James Danforth "Dan" Quayle

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#151178 - 04/04/06 01:24 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:
Originally posted by socalpunX:
Ian,

is that you ? [Wave]
Fuck you.

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#151179 - 04/04/06 01:30 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:
Originally posted by socalpunX:
Ian,

is that you ? [Wave]
I read a post form "fog" on the goneMoab thread and he invited everyone to Ian' house for a BIG party after gone.

Me thinks this mysterious "fog" fellow might be an incarnation of Ian or viceversa. smile

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#151180 - 04/04/06 01:33 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:
Me thinks this mysterious "fog" fellow might be an incarnation of Ian or viceversa. smile [/QB]
Who is the "fucking oldest guy" on the forum?

Yes it's me. I saw the GoneMoab dates were before Memorial Day, and wanted to invite anyone traveling East a chance to get drunk smile

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#151181 - 04/04/06 01:34 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Sweet, I got a 5 rating!
Go me!

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#151182 - 04/04/06 01:45 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:
Originally posted by fog:
Quote:
Me thinks this mysterious "fog" fellow might be an incarnation of Ian or viceversa. smile
Who is the "fucking oldest guy" on the forum?

Yes it's me. I saw the GoneMoab dates were before Memorial Day, and wanted to invite anyone traveling East a chance to get drunk smile [/QB]
You know its bad when you cant even frequent your site under a different alias and people can still tell by the tone of your post' that its you.

By the way [Wave] . WIll you be in Moab?

I have 5 trucks also. Hmmm. Thanks to, whom ever for what ever. laugh

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#151183 - 04/04/06 01:48 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Tried to fix that truck rating for you, but I guess too many others gave you a 5. Oh well laugh

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#151184 - 04/04/06 01:50 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Tonka Ross Offline
Member

Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 2397
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC
Best XOC quote ever from Grayham....

"Everyone knows it's barbaric to use a live cat or dog. Gawd.

They should be using liberals. Or freedom-haters. Or Cindy Sheehan's labia. Or is that all redundant?

Either way, I think these people suck.

But if they're gonna continue, I'll happily ship them my neighbor's pooch. Noisy fucker. Wonder if he's ever read a Peter Benchley novel? Here, Fido . . . "


And if you don't think that's funny, then there basically something wrong with you. laugh

Spanky!!!
_________________________
"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”

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#151185 - 04/04/06 02:00 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
spalind Offline
Member

Registered: 30/01/03
Posts: 3238
Loc: Windham, NH
Quote:
Originally posted by fog:
Quote:
Me thinks this mysterious "fog" fellow might be an incarnation of Ian or viceversa. smile
Who is the "fucking oldest guy" on the forum?

Yes it's me. I saw the GoneMoab dates were before Memorial Day, and wanted to invite anyone traveling East a chance to get drunk smile [/QB]
He lives!! He lives!!! laugh

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#151186 - 04/04/06 02:18 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Todrick Offline
Member

Registered: 08/08/00
Posts: 7759
Loc: Arizona
LOL, fog.... lol

you're missing a "gie" from the end of your screen name

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#151187 - 04/04/06 02:34 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:
ACTUALLY, that isnt my the X from back then. That is me alright. that pic is of an 04 Xterra. The one during "Jonathan" screen name was an 02...
Quote:
the tire thing is over with... i dont understand why people continue to beat the dead horse? I got a better w/ less travel for my tires. My price was for pick up. They wanted ME to drive 4 hours out the way. When i could save time.. it would have cost me another 20 bucks to have my tire removed from my spare. Sorry If i made anyone mad, the only that can be mad @ me Is Dana.

I made another name because my first name was Banned. 2 years ago... I didnt own my 2nd Xterra till 2 years later. I made a new name caused no DRAMA.. until XMountaineer drug me through the dirt.

I posted a problem on here and usual XOC fashion i get bashed. Thats why this board has such negitive feedback to it.
XinitUp

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#151188 - 04/04/06 02:41 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Paul H Offline
Member

Registered: 23/08/01
Posts: 4757
Loc: Mt. Zion, IL
Quote:
Originally posted by fog:
Sweet, I got a 5 rating!
Go me!
[ThumbsUp] [ThumbsUp] [ThumbsUp] [ThumbsUp] [ThumbsUp]
_________________________
2001 Super Black XE R.I.P. 09/05/06
My Blog

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#151189 - 04/04/06 03:27 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


[Wave]
Yeah, be there, or at least send your better half.
[drink]

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#151190 - 04/04/06 05:38 PM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Anonymous
Unregistered


Jeff digging up the dead (as ussual) and from the Dead Ian pops up and wastes no time getting back into the swing o things. [Argue] [LOL] [ThumbsUp]

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#151191 - 05/04/06 08:26 AM Re: XOC's greatest quotes
Smith Offline
Member

Registered: 19/07/01
Posts: 2032
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC
Quote:
Originally posted by fog:
Sweet, I got a 5 rating!
Go me!
Who is member # 15094?

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